dislocation (heartache)

Something about angles that dangle
in isometric triangles
And now I'm in a tangle
'cos Teacher asked me something
(and I slept while she was talking).

The bell rings - I'm saved!
My indiscretions waived.
"You owe me," Teacher said,
but I was off to home and (more importantly)
bed.

To do or not to do
my homework after school?
Or do I heed the call
To lepak in the mall?

What to wear? How do I look?
Do I look like I bought off a pasar malam hook?
Should I care if they look at me funny?
Not as long as no one laughs at me.

In the mall it's a regular carnival.
The girls watch the boys who stare at other girls.
See couples on parade, hand in sticky hand;
The rich (and not-so-rich) kids flash their fashion brands.

Hi there, how are you? Oh, hi! So, so.
Here with somebody? Well, actually... no.
Heh heh. Goodbye, Then they speed away.
Lonely and embarrassed, what a perfect day.

Home again, home again, jigetty jig.
Father's looking furious, must be something big.
My report card, oh oh, looks as if he's seen it.
Guess it's time to face hell for three hours and a bit.

"Everyday you sit around, watch TV and you laze.
How do you expect to make it through this paper chase?
You throw away chances I did not have, to do what I could not do."
Only he doesn't realize, I never wanted to.

I'm sorry I wasn't born to live your life again
To make the choices you did not make
To dream the dreams you did break

Who am I? Where am I going?
Why so hard to heed my heart's yearning?
What do I want in life? Where do I belong?
What is right and what is wrong?

What is wrong you ask?

It is wrong to speak when not spoken to
It is wrong to be spontaneous, out of the blue
It is wrong to be wild, wrong to be mad,
Wrong to fail and make you look bad

It is wrong to dream, wrong to be angry
Wrong to scream out my soul's agony
Wrong to harbour a child's ambitions
Against your hopes and expectations

So simple, too simple, it would be to slip and trip
and stumble and fall
Off the top of a tall, tall...
"GOODBYE ONE AND ALL!"
then thud... then blood... then
nothing at all.

Forgive me

though what I say is true.
Do I disappoint you?

The morning comes, a new dawn breaks.
One more day of heartache.