Long Days, Longer Nights

Is it bright where you are
Have the people changed
Does it make you happy you're so strange
And in your darkest hour, I hold secret's flame
You can watch the world devoured in its pain
The Smashing Pumpkins : The End Is The Beginning Is The End

Away from the usual bustle of year-end parties, the changing of the year suddenly seemed long and drawn out. I suppose the end of 2006 for me was something quite different. After all, it ended with a beginning. And by the time the new year began, an end was coming close.

On the eve of the eve, I crawled out of bed at the ungodly hour of five. In the morning! After a long, slow drive back to my hometown the day before. After several straight beers with several straight mates, only four hours before.

The mission - head on down south with the boys, cross the border, abduct a girl from her home (after bartering with her sisters and crashing the doors), ferry her to my hometown, and make her serve tea to her new family. In case you're wondering, this is how Chinese get married.

Not entirely difficult, but I was worn out by the end of the day, what with the incessant travelling and all. Oh, but it wasn't over. After all, when the sun sets, the wedding banquet begins. What can I say that isn't already known? Greasy food, lots of beer. Let those who enjoy talking talk. I sat there, shovelling food into my mouth (when there was food on the table) and just tuned into various conversations around the table. Thankfully, everyone seems to have tired of asking That Question. Or That Other Question, come to think of it.

The dinner ended before midnight, and most of the others adjourned somewhere to continue their drinking - sans bride and groom (obviously the absence of the guests-of-honour will not deter them from toasting the happy couple... repeatedly).

I, on the other, made a visit to the hospital to see my aunt. It was new year's eve by then.

I think I went to bed after one. I know I woke up about 4:30 in the morning. My mother had called me from the hospital. It was bad. I should get the rest of the family over. Immediately.

It was bad. She was clearly in pain. But still she managed to call for us, and gasp out whatever she had to say for each of us - her sister, her children, her grandchildren. Prepared as we were, it was still quite a painful morning for all of us. I'm only glad that I could be useful in little ways, running errands and such. It was easier having something to do, and it gave my cousins that little more time with their mother.

By midday, however, she had stabilised. She seemed calmer, more relaxed. Perhaps it was knowing she had seen everyone she wanted to see. Perhaps it was knowing she had said all she wanted to say. Perhaps it was the sedatives.

For the rest of the days there, my time was divided between home and hospital. I was either eating (my family eats whenever and wherever we gather, no matter the circumstance), sleeping (or half-sleeping), or reading. I had brought two books back with me - Eldest (which I had bought quite some time back, and forgot I haven't read until I after I watched Eragon), and Coraline (a buttony-cute horror story, also a Christmas present from Will - thanks!).

Tired as I was, I barely put down my books - even to sleep. So it was when I turned the last page of Eldest, I looked up to check the time. It was midnight. It was a new year. My brother had already left, sending his wife and baby back to their home. My parents were already asleep. I felt like I ought to say something. Do something. So I sent one sms and went to bed.

Like I said, it had been a long week.

Now that I'm back in the valley, I've come to realise how much I miss my friends. They're truly my family here, and their company has very much been my comfort. I hope I don't take too much for granted. I hope I can give them as much as they've given me.

Resolutions? I'm not one for resolutions - never any good with them. And even if I wanted to make any right now, it's a little hard to see beyond tomorrow. Day after. Next week. But that's okay. I already have a lot.

I have hope, and faith, and love.

I may be a little wiser and perhaps a smidgeon more mature, but I have not become jaded - a promise I had made to myself many, many, many years back, when I was yet a boy learning the meaning of that word.

I have a strong family (never underestimate the uniting force of a dinner table).

And some darn good friends.

Oh and not forgetting hor... a nice apartment, a nice car, a nice phone, a nice laptop, a nice chair, a nice closet full of nice clothes, several nice bags...

The only thing missing is that nice body. And a nice widescreen LCD TV.